I am sorry for not writing in here lately. I doubt anyone noticed.
I have arrived in Colorado. It was a long and uneventful drive, besides killing a bird. Well, my windshield killed a bird. And I thought. A lot.
Before leaving Louisville, my sister introduced me to her friend Jen and her dog Zygote. Jen briefly and non-seriously mentioned as I prepared to drive off that I should call her to let her know what I learned while I traveled. But I'll just let her read this.
I learned that I make things into too big of a deal.
That is to say, it is hard for me to let things - anything - go. Out of the slightest of actions or decisions I make great determinants of personal merit, of value, of worth. Of identity.
So when I make a mistake, I fail.
When I fail, I am a failure.
This is not altogether correct, I feel.
4 years ago
5 comments:
i noticed, you crazy sack of potatoes.
also, when you don't fail, and you succeed - do you feel like a winner?
or is it just the one side of the coin you focus on?
i love you! glad you made it to colorado safely
i started clinicals.
No, that's not entirely correct. But I definitely identify with the feeling. But that doesn't make either one of us failures :-P
I noticed too, you foo.
I wish you wouldn't be so hard on yourself. I think you are wonderful, and I know you pretty well. It's been going on 23 years now, right?
Glad you could come see us before you hit the road.
Love you.
I noticed too! And don't be so hard on yourself! btw, I'm glad you made it to Colorado safely. I'm sorry again about not getting to say goodbye at school...
i noticed. and congratulations on graduating and maybe learning something on the way to CO
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