Friday, April 4, 2008

This is How it Goes.

Okay, I'm going to tell you what I'm going to do, and then I'm going to do it.

I will share with you two anecdotes, the first semi-humorous and the second harrowing. In each I will share a problem and how that problem ended up well. Then I will turn the whole thing into a chapel talk.

First: I toasted a tortilla yesterday to munch on while doing work. It had no holes or tears, and thus when heated the inside air expanded the entire tortilla puffed up like a Whoopee cushion. In order to let the air out so that the tortilla would not harden into a big crispy balloon, I bit an edge. The air came out, and burned my lip. After several minutes under the faucet, it hurt less, but only because my lip was numb. I am still in the process of regaining sensation.

How it ended up well: now I can tell ladies the story and ask them to kiss it and make it feel better.

Second: I took a CLEP test today, after half-hearted studying and little rest. Upon starting the test, I learned that if I failed I would not be able to retake the test for six months, effectively removing my ability to graduate in a month.

How it ended up well: I passed.

How it becomes a chapel talk: And isn't that a bit like Jesus? [Insert random yet well-known inspirational verse, nothing challenging]

[Reiterate self-centered stories here, with slight word change to tie in the religious part]

[End with no challenge, and no change]

I am frustrated in my heart today.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

i just want to tell the congregation how moved i was by brother matthew's sermon today. I am convicted in my heart of my sins.
God be praised.

Cole said...

haha i liked the spin into a chapel talk. very inspirational. btw, congrats on passing the clep test :)

Anonymous said...

i'll kiss it and make it better!!!
<3 haha
i love you lucas matthews